31w2d – que excitement

31 weeks seems like such a huge number! We’re getting pretty disgustingly excited.

On Christmas my family started a pool guessing what day she’ll arrive. Only one person guessed after my due date so, if I’m late I think I’ll have a hard time dealing with it since everyone is convinced she’ll be early.

A few weeks ago I made our baby registry. Which was fairly overwhelming. I left Hubbin at home because he thinks babies shouldn’t need anything and I knew if I took him with me I would leave the store with NOTHING on the registry.

A biiiiig package arrived today. Que my excitement!!! (I bought this, it was not a gift)




I put it together straight away (probably in less than 30 minutes with no special tools, I was surprised how easy it was) and I’m quite pleased. Excuse my pajamas in the last shot. And yes it was 2pm, don’t judge me.

We’re slowly gathering baby related equipment, my shower isn’t until the beginning of March so I’m trying to slow down with my desire to have *everything* *now*. Hubbin has finished building the dresser but that’s it. The wardrobe is still in boxes and I did finally order a crib. Which was somewhat scary for me…. I put it off for a long time.

The sensation of feeling like I need to get thing set up and ready is starting to creep in. Which is vying with my other emotions where I’m still hesitant on some things like “is it too early to buy a carseat at 30 weeks”. “Am I going to jinx myself”. I guess, crib and carseat are distinctly “big baby items” which might be why we started backwards with buying a dresser and a closet for her… ???

My baby shower will be the beginning of March everyone so far has said “wow that’s really cutting it close isn’t it?” Maybe I’m still a little nervous deep down?

Hubbin recently rented the odd life of Timothy green for us to watch this weekend. Which, I had NO IDEA what that movie was about. I cried like the whole first 30-45 minutes and the whole last 30 minutes. Hubbin thought it was ultimately a happy movie… It just brought up so many emotions. Thank god I didn’t go see that in the movie theaters. I was so relieved that I could feel her wiggling during the movie. And then I had all kinds of guilt emotions cause I was pregnant too. I spend extra time talking to my belly before bed telling her that even though I moan and grunt I’m still very thankful she’s taking up all that room in there. I also had to spend time reassuring myself that even though I went through infertility it doesn’t mean I have to LIKE things like puking and heart burn and back pain, that that doesn’t make me ungrateful or a bad person.

And on that note… My cousin is pregnant again, who if you’ll recall got pregnant in the spring right before her wedding and I cried in the grocery store after I got off the phone with her when she told me because my third IUI had failed. Then consequently felt super guilty when she had a miscarriage. She had a second miscarriage in the fall but is now pregnant again. I’m hoping this one sticks around, I suspect it will since she had to go to te ER for fluids and nausea meds but she hasn’t made it past the point if the first pregnancy so were all kind of holding our breath right now….


2 thoughts on “31w2d – que excitement

  1. Hurray for pregnancies! I’m still at the hold-my-breath stage. And not to freak you out, my one of my best friends had a baby nearly two weeks ago and he had a few little problems… which led to tests.. which led to find out that he has Down’s Syndrome. I sobbed. I’ve been not-quite-panicky this whole pregnancy (we’re at 23 weeks) that *something* will happen. All of my religious training tells me that I should have more faith and that everything will be okay, regardless of what happens. But tell THAT to my crazy woman pregnancy hormone-driven emotions!!!!!

    I read your posts and always find it… what’s the word…? It’s different… because you feel guilt over so many different things. You felt guilty that you resented someone else’s pregnancy. And now that you’re pregnant, you feel guilty about having felt guilty. 🙂 I have had a few small emotions like this for THIS pregnancy. My guilt has come because I had two kids and wanted another one but couldn’t have one. But why did I feel that way when so many women can’t have babies of their own, was I greedy? And now that I’m pregnant, I don’t feel guilt so much as I feel like anything I might do could jinx the pregnancy. I guess I feel guilty for feeling that way. 🙂 Anyhow. Random thoughts.

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